Remedial Remedy
by ellabellaboo
Summary: [Luby] [That was when the real darkness made itself known...] ['Give me long kiss goodnight and everything will be alright']
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing and no one, I wish I did 'cause If I then I would be a VERY happy bunny :) The words in italics are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine. Sadly I didn't write them.

**Dedication and Thanks:**_ This story is for Josefin, Alice, Elissa and Tani! 3 I love you guys :) Oh and HUGE thanks go to Andy, you're great too! _

* * *

As the first tinges of dusk streaked across the Chicago skyline, it started. It was inevitable. Every night was the same; there was no escape, no way out, no remedy. Luka hated closing his eyes at night; that was when the real darkness made itself known. Not the physical darkness, but the mental darkness. It was unavoidable, inescapable, incurable. It seeped into his body as if entering through his very skin, smothering him silently in his dreams, stifling his cries for help.

It didn't make sense. He should have been comfortable in the dark, he'd had enough experience. Since that day in Croatia, darkness had incarcerated his life. Sure there had been short sparks of light, short, meaningless flames. They illumed the void of darkness in Luka's life for a moment, but eventually began to flicker, and gradually faded away taking the light with them, leaving a trail of self-destruction in their wake. There had been one exception. Abby. She hadn't been meaningless, and she hadn't faded away, no. Rather Luka had extinguished her in a moment of madness, in a moment that he would regret forever.

The 'darkness' was no darkness as such; it was more a concoction of Luka's innermost fears, feelings and memories. Memories. They were the worst aspects of the darkness. In the day he could push it aside, mask it behind a smile, cover it up. But at night there were no hiding places, there was no where to hide. Once his eyes shut there was no going back, no protection. Images, horrific terrible images emerged, encased behind his closed lids. They danced contemptuously across his mind, terrorising his subconscious, and haunting his dreams.

_Take away the sensation inside,  
Bitter sweet migraine in my head._

_It's like a throbbing tooth-ache of the mind,  
I can't take this feeling anymore._

_Drain the pressure from the swelling,  
The sensation's overwhelming._

He couldn't stand it any longer. He just couldn't, he wasn't strong enough.

Luka sank onto the bed, drained of energy, hope, happiness; drained. His finger traced a pattern across the dial on the telephone as it lay on the table beside him. It was a pattern he thought of each and every time he called someone, but one which he had not built up the courage to dial for a very long time. Without noticing, Luka had unintentionally keyed in the number and a call had been made. Only it wasn't unintentional at all. Luka had meant to make the phone call, he just didn't know that he could, he didn't know that he was brave enough. A voice was heard in the receiver.

"Hello?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **Once again, I do not own anything, not even the computer I am writing this on:O I know there are none in this chapter, but even so the words in italics and with central alignment are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine. Sadly I didn't write them.

Oh and by the way, I realised that this could be potentially confusing 'cause I need to explain that the small sections of italics after speech are generally Luka's POV. Um. Yah. No wait. A few are Abby's too. Oh erm. The italics show the thoughts of the person who has just spoken! THAT'S IT! Hope that clears things up:S –x–

**Dedication:**As ever, this story is dedicated to Josefin, Alice, Elissa, Tani and Andy, you constantly support me and also my writing and you all make me smile. THANK YOU!

* * *

"Hello? Hello!" there was a slight pause, "I swear to god if you keep calling me in the middle of the night I'm gonna..."

Luka couldn't just stay silent. He would happily have sat there, soaking in her voice, but she'd obviously been plagued by some disgusting person who found some perverted pleasure in frightening her, and he could detect the hint of terror in her voice. It broke his heart. Again.

"Abby," he managed to blurt out, "It's me, it's Luka, from work, from the hospital," _Smooth Luka, very smooth, good one! _Luka shook his head and congratulated himself on his oh-so-very articulate sentence structure. He had never been one for phone conversations.

"Luka," she said, her tone instantly softening. He loved the way she pronounced his name; it was gentle, calm, beautiful… just like her. "What are you doing up now? It's 2:15am Luka, what's going on?"

Luka could hear her trying to shake the last traces of slumber from her mind and instantly felt terrible. What was he doing phoning her at such an unnatural hour? Only it wasn't unnatural. Well, not for him anyway. He'd seen 2:15, 3:15, 4:15… he'd seen them all; he saw them every night.

"I'm sorry I woke you," he said sincerely, clutching the receiver. Somehow just hearing her voice eased the pain slightly. But it also bought a sense of heaviness, like a weight crushing his chest, squashing his lungs, making even the simple task of breathing near to impossible. _What was that feeling? Longing maybe?_ He was so close to her, and yet so far, and it was killing him. Still he couldn't stop; he _had_ to speak to her.

"Don't be silly Luka," she replied, "I'm always here for you." _Oops._ _Stop Abby, stop! Quick, make a joke, lighten the mood, change the subject!... Erm. _"Idon't _really_ need to sleep desperately anyway. It's not like I have been on night shifts for the last week and a half, have had literally no sleep whatsoever and can't push the niggling feeling that I may be on the verge of a nervous breakdown out of my mind, or anything!"

Luka detected a smile unfurling upon her face as she said it and couldn't help laughing throatily. She often had that effect on him. She could drag him from the deepest depths of despair with just one word, with just one look. In fact, one glance at her smiling face lifted Luka's heart.

Like everything else about him, Luka's laugh was contagious. No matter how hard Abby tried to fight it, she couldn't suppress a laugh. It had always been like that with Luka. No matter how hard Abby tried to forget what it was to be like with him, enveloped in his strong, muscular arms, she just couldn't. Here she was trying to fight her feelings, and yet despite her best intentions, here she was, falling for him all over again. Maybe she'd never really stopped falling for him.

"Are you okay? Has something happened?" Abby gushed, her tone suddenly becoming noticeably nervous. _Something must be wrong! Why else would he be calling at this time?_ If something ever happened to Luka, her Luka… well no. Not _her_ Luka, he was only hers in her head. If anything ever happened to him, she didn't think she could go on. In fact she knew she couldn't. She'd already lost him once before and it had almost… well perhaps it would be better not to talk about what almost happened. The only thing keeping her going was the chance, the hope that she could win him back.

Luka smiled a little despite himself, he knew it was wrong but he secretly liked the fact that she was worried about for him. Maybe that meant she still felt something for him?

"Abby." _Luka what is wrong with you?_ _Seriously,_ _get to the point! All you have to say is_… "Abby-I-need-you-to-come-over, no. I-want-you-to-come-over, I-can't-face-this-darkness-alone. You-give-me-strength, you-make-everything-feel-alright." _Oh shit! Did you really say that! Yes, yes you did. Oh well done Luka._

Silence.

_SHIT! Quick, say something, anything… _"I'm scared Abby, I don't want to be alone. I want to be with you."_ Oh no no NO, not that, anything but that! "_Abby I'm so sorry; I don't know what came over me, I… I…" _Oh what's the point? You've said it now, you idiot. Congratulations Luka, she'll never speak to you again, she won't even look at you. _It wouldn't have mattered if it were anyone else, no-one else mattered that much. No one mattered as much as Abby; She mattered more to Luka than anything, more than anyone.

Silence.

Then.

"Luka, I'm on my way."


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I don't own ANYTHING; not Luka, not Abby… NOTHING! I only wish I did:( The words in italics and with central alignment are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine but once again there are none in this particular chapter.

As before, the italics after speech show the thoughts of the person who has just spoken, (mostly it's Luka's POV but there are a few bits of Abby's POV stuck in there! ;)

**Dedication:**This story is dedicated to Josefin, Alice, Elissa, Tani and Andy, who review even though they have often read the chapter already! You guys are amazing, and I love you all! THANK YOU! ** 3 **Also a massive thank you goes to my lovely reviewers, especially Karissa, your comments make a huge difference:)

* * *

Abby wanted to comfort him.

Abby wanted to see him.

Abby wanted to help.

Abby was coming.

Abby cared.

Abby.

A faint tapping was heard at the door; once, twice, a short pause, then thrice. A smile tickled the edges of Luka's mouth. She remembered. She remembered how she used to knock at his door all those years ago, and like all those years before, Luka opened the door to her, he opened his heart to her, and she stepped in.

Luka gazed at her, transfixed, mesmerised by her natural beauty. Even in the early hours of the morning she looked stunning. Her cheeks were tinted with a faint, rosy blush, and her perfectly formed lips were stroked discreetly with a crimson sheen, her face was dusted with a fair coloured powder… she looked utterly incredible. She _was_ incredible. She had left the comfortable warmth of her own home in the middle of the night; she had torn herself from sleep, just to be with him. His eyes wandered to the pale woollen shawl curled around her neck and to the flakes of snow resting calmly on the lashes of her eyes. In the soft glow of his living room, she looked even more beautiful, he didn't think it possible, but he had been proved wrong.

Abby glanced down. _No Abby… look up, look up, LOOK UP! Don't look down there Abby. Stop it! Why did he always look so good? _Even though his shoulders slumped and rich, satin tinges lurked beneath his eyes, he still looked amazing, but then again, when did Luka Kovac _not_ look amazing? Abby couldn't help but notice his bare chest and the way his coffee coloured skin stretched across his muscular form… _stop it Abby, look up!_ Once again Abby found her eyes drawn to the shaded smudges, the only blemishes on Luka's otherwise perfect form, but as if she was in a trance, her gaze was tempted into his exquisitely deep eyes.

They stood there. Perfectly still. Neither wanting to break the connection they so clearly both felt, but both desperately wanting to close the distance between them. If only they knew how. No. They both knew _how_ to do it, of course they did; they just didn't know if they should.

Luka knew he had to say something; she had been standing in his apartment for the best part of 10 minutes, and he had not offered to take her coat, he'd not uttered a single world, he'd done nothing, not a single thing.

"Abby," he whispered in an almost inaudible tone. He had no idea what he was going to say, he didn't know how to voice how he was feeling, he only hoped she would understand.

Abby stepped towards him slowly, eradicating the gap between their two bodies.

"You don't have to speak." _Where had he heard that before?_

"I… I…" He started, overcome by the closeness. A heat washed over him. Over them both; she felt it too.

"I want to… to thank y…" Luka tried again, his heart pummelling hard at his ribcage.

Abby raised her hand and pressed her finger against his lips.

"I know." She said simply, a soft smile forming on her face. She made no attempt to remove her hand from his lips and he quivered at the feeling of being so close to her, and sweet aroma of her perfume. He remembered that scent from when they had been together, he'd loved it then, and he loved it now.

He couldn't bear it any longer, the contact between them was not enough, he longed to feel her close. Closer. Impulse triumphed over common sense; Luka's arms wrapped around Abby's petite body and slowly, he drew her closer to his own. He held his breath, waiting for her to pull back, to run away. But she didn't. Her hand slid down from his mouth to his chest, and then both her arms encircled his waist. The movement was languid, like it was only natural, like it was meant to be. He stroked her back with his slender fingers, sending a tingling feeling all through her body. Abby trembled slightly, revelling in the sensation only _his_ touch could give her.

After so many years of yearning, she was finally home in his arms, in the only place she felt truly happy.

After so many years of yearning, she was finally home in his arms, in the only place _he_ felt truly happy.

Reluctantly, Abby dragged herself out from his warm embrace, not completely; she didn't want to break contact entirely.

"Luka, it's late, we should try to get some sleep."

He nodded, she was right, she was usually right. He felt her moving away slightly and in a desperate attempt to stop her, he blurted out,

"Please sleep with me!" _Argh! No! Not like that! Well… maybe like that… but no! Fix it! Say something Luka!_ Abby raised an eyebrow and smiled, clearly amused at the way in which the words were spilling from his mouth. "I mean, in my bed!" _Oh that's much better!_ "Not like that!" _How does she do this! Why did he always melt when she was around!_ "I just don't want to face this…" He gestured towards his head, "I don't want to face this alone. I _can't_ face it alone. I can't face it without. You." His head dropped, a scarlet shade threatening to flare up upon his cheeks and he didn't want her to see that. _Argh!_

Abby tenderly lifted his head so he was looking directly into her eyes and ran her smooth hand over his course cheek.

"I was going to even if you didn't ask."

Reassurance. He heard it in her words, and saw it in her eyes.

She took his hand in hers, admiring the way they blended together so flawlessly, and gently guided him towards his bedroom.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **Here would be where I would say something very witty and intelligent, but I can't think of a word to say, so basically I don't own Luka or Abby, they are not my private property, and neither are the words in italics and with central alignment. They are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine.

As before, the italics after speech show the thoughts of the person who has just spoken, though sometimes the person doesn't speak first, but I'm sure you'll work out what's what, you're all clever on here!

**Dedication:**This story is dedicated to Josefin, Alice, Elissa, Tani and Andy, who are actually incredible and always make me smile. Thank you guys, for everything, I love you! I also want to make a point of mentioning Karissa and Mackenzie 'cause they're also very lovely people and deserve a special mention!

**Thanks:** I want to say a massive thank you to my lovely reviewers because your comments make an enormous difference and give me a HUGE boost of confidence and encourage me to keep writing:)

For all you Lubies out there, this should (I hope!) make you happy, but I do have to warn you, the story won't be quite so fluffy next chapter! –shocked face-

* * *

Any other night he would have rather died than enter that room.

But tonight was different.

If he had been with any other person, he would have wrenched his hand free and fled from that room.

But tonight was different.

Tonight he wasn't scared.

Tonight he wasn't alone.

Tonight he was with Abby.

Abby had his hand, Abby had his heart, and he knew she wouldn't ever let go. Never.

As they passed through the doorframe however, the familiar feeling coursed through his body, ravaging his senses, gnawing at his heart. _Think of Abby. She's here; she's holding your hand. She's here Luka, she's here and she's going nowhere._

He stopped.

His feet wouldn't allow him to move, his feet were rooted in position. He couldn't move, he just couldn't. His legs shook beneath him, as if they could give way at any given moment, like they were unable to support his weight, and the weight of the darkness pressing down on him.

She stopped.

Stepping closer to him, she wrapped her arm around his waist, draped his limp arm across her shoulder, and slowly steered him to the centre of the dimly-lit room.

"It's okay Luka," was all she could murmur as she urged him, gently, to perch on the edge of the bed. The moment his body came into contact with the sheets, his head rolled forwards, sinking into the protective shell of his hands. _Oh Luka, what shall I do? What can I do to help you? Tell me what to do, I don't know what to do, what shall I do?_ She slid into the space between his legs and, removing his head from his hands, lifted his chin upwards, so that, for the umpteenth time that night, his gaze was channelled straight into her eyes. She watched as immense salted droplets welled up in his eyes and then rolled down his cheeks, _oh Luka._ As the familiar jerk wrenched at her heart, the very same one she felt each time she saw him in pain, Abby did the only thing she could do. She slowly brushed the tears from his face, capturing one solitary glass orb on her fingertip, and as he watched her steadily, she rubbed her fingers together, and the tear vanished. She knew she hadn't gotten rid of it completely, more would come, of course they would, but she would be there to catch them as they fell. Luka smiled faintly, he knew she would always dry his tears, she always had.

Abby stood there, his inner thighs pressed firmly against her legs, the contact reigniting the fire that had been fizzling out since they split up all those years ago, for what seemed like a very long time, though she didn't want it to end. She held his head to her, resting her own upon it, and ran her fingers through his thick, silken mane. Her touch was medicinal; _no wonder she makes such a great doctor, I only hope she doesn't touch her patients quite this intimately!_ Unwillingly, she released his head and leant back slightly to look at him, and a soft smile graced her lips as she observed at the serene expression that had formed on his perfect features, he looked calmer somehow, maybe even happier? Little did she know that he _was_ happier, he was always happier around her, he was happier _because_ of her.

Luka gazed at her; the urge to kiss her, to taste her again, sent shivers down his spine and pulses all through his body. He cautiously inched his face towards hers, _don't mess this Luka, don't waste this chance, don't loose her again. _Abby let out a slight moan of pleasure as she felt the warmth of his breath wash over her face. Completely lost in the moment, she didn't move. _Shit. You've blown it now Luka, you moved too quickly and you've screwed it up. Luka you're an arse! _Suddenly the warmth disappeared and the cold Chicago breeze clawed at her skin, reminding her, like a punch in the stomach, of the time she had spent alone, or practically alone. Alone meant being incomplete. She had kidded herself that she wasn't alone, that she _was _complete, in the folds of worn sheets, and in the embrace of men. Carter. She had fooled herself that he completed her, but deep down, she knew that only one person could fill that void. Since being complete meant being with Luka, being alone meant being without Luka. To her horror, she saw his face fall and felt his arms loosen around her, the harsh cold tearing at her heart, the fear of being alone and without him ripping through her.

_Give me the long kiss goodnight and everything will be alright,  
Tell me that I won't feel a thing._

Placing her hands against either side of his face, Abby tenderly pressed her lips against his. The feeling and taste of her lips upon his, made him weak at the knees, causing him to tremble uncontrollably. Her arms slipped down to his neck as she pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. He felt her lips stretch into a smile beneath his own and happiness swept over him, over them both. She picked up his hand, entwining their fingers, then slowly pulled back, pressing a trail of kisses into his strong hand.

Wordlessly, Luka eased Abby's coat from her shoulders, lightly caressing the skin exposed by her top, and after she slipped the shoes from her feet, the top from her body, and the trousers from her legs, they slid under the quilt. Abby moved her body closer to his, reveling in the sensation of his bare skin against her own, and pressed another sweet kiss onto his lips. Their bodies faced inwards, towards each other, and their hands liked together, neither we alone, neither were incomplete.

Abby watched as Luka's eyelids grew heavy and as slumber enfolded his body. She listened as his breathing deepened, resisting the urge to hold him closer. She wanted to more than anything, but she knew she had to let him sleep. She only wished that she could protect him from his demons, from his dreams, from the darkness._ Oh Luka, I love you so much. _


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** I remember reading someone's disclaimer here on FF once, and I liked it, so whoever you are, I'm quoting you: "I own nothing, just my Luka and Abby shaped cookies." I think you get the point, I do not own Luka or Abby sadly! Oh and the words in italics and with central alignment are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine, they're not mine either!

**Dedication: **As ever, this story is dedicated to Josefin, Alice, Elissa, Tani, and Andy but I also dedicate this to the new entries of Kenzie and Karissa. All of you are amazing, sweet, lovely people and make me smile. Thank you guys, for everything, I love you all!

**Thanks:** I want to say a massive thank you to my wonderful reviewers (Josefin-, Andy2301, BeautifulWreck, Peaky, Alik22, CocaCola1052, strumpfhase, LLF, Muskoka Girl, CarbyLivesOn, Moonlight Enchantments, trillion kisses) because your comments make an enormous difference and give me a HUGE boost of confidence and encourage me to keep writing:)

**WARNING:** This is going to be completely different from usual, and is supposed to be dark and sinister. I don't think I succeeded, but I did try though! Abby isn't mentioned directly in this chapter, but don't loose faith my lovely Lubies, she _is_ there, all the time. That didn't make much sense did it? Oh dear! I'll explain next chapter!

Ooh yeah! I have had to research a lot for this chapter but as we don't know all that much about Luka's past, I've had to be a bit creative! I tried to keep as close to the truth as I could, but I –make- a few things up, I hope that's okay!

I also want to add that I make Luka out to be to blame in this chapter, but THAT IS NOT MY OWN VIEW! I'm just trying to portray Luka's demons and the immense guilt he carries from the incident. PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!

* * *

Croatia.

Vukovar.

If only he hadn't been so stubborn. If only he hadn't been so selfish. If only he had known that his decision to finish his internship would end like that. If only he had heeded the advice that was given. If only he had taken them away from there. If only he had not left the apartment that morning; not left them alone. If only the bomb hadn't hit.

If only.

1991.

The year his world came crumbling down around him. Four numbers maliciously bound together to form one date, - just one, were enough to tear his life into tatters and send them fluttering down around him. A date carved into his mind, impressed into his soul, never to be forgotten, always to be feared.

Protection.

All he ever wanted to do was protect them, he just didn't know how to. Heaven knows he'd tried; He'd kept them cooped up inside their tiny apartment, imprisoned in the building, and saw as they fidgeted and whined, irritable and suffering from Cabin Fever as a result of not being unable to go outside for such a long time. He knew they hated it, and he hated to see it, but he didn't know what else to do to protect them. He did what he thought was right, all he could think of doing. He did all that he could.

Safety.

He should have saved them, that was what he was supposed to do. He could have saved them earlier if he had taken them away from there, if he hadn't waited until it was too late and too unsafe to leave. It was his fault, he knew that. There was nothing he could do to change that, it was his fault and it always would be.

A wife and two children, gone. Just like that, gone. In one blink of an eye, gone. Gone forever. Gone.

He'd only planned to be gone for a few minutes; he had only gone out to get some food. When he left the apartment that morning he left his life behind, never to be seen again. Had he known what was going to happen, he never would have left.

A son. Marko. Two years old. Gone.

He was so small, so little, so vulnerable. He never even had a chance. As soon as the shell hit, Marko's short, short life was ended instantly. He was so young; he hadn't even experienced life properly. All he had been granted was a nibble, a sip of life, and boy did he have a thirst for it. He absorbed life, all aspects of it, always looking around; trying to drink in something more, he was such an inquisitive child, always loving simply being himself, simply being alive. Marko's face never seen without a smile plastered across it, until that day. On that day, no smile was visible. All to be seen there was an expression of extreme anguish etched across his features as his tiny arms stretched out before him, reaching out for something, someone. Reaching out for the father who hadn't been there.

A daughter. Jasna. Four years old. Gone.

She was so kind, so sweet; she had so much to give. Jasna fought to hold onto her life, fought with all her might, she wasn't ready to go, it wasn't her time to go, she didn't want to go. Her frail form lay among the broken debris when he saw her. She was pale as death, her lips a splash of red on her otherwise colourless face. He pummelled upon her small chest with all the strength he could muster, the tears streaming down his face, splashing onto her closed eyelids, until all he could do was cradle her tiny body in his arms as his daughter took her final breaths.

A wife. A mother. Danijela. Gone.

She was so beautiful, so loving; she never had a harsh word to say about anyone. Danijela had been his first love. The moment he had seen her, he knew he loved her. He just knew. The memory he had of day they married was unbelievable, it was nearly as happy as the memories he had of the days on which Jasna and Marko were born. But that's all they were, memories. Memories that would only ever be memories, memories like the ones of his family that he would have to rely on after that day was over. He could have saved Danijela. Well maybe, but maybe not. He wasn't technically a doctor then; he might be able to_ now_, but back then? He wasn't sure._ Who are you kidding Luka? You could have saved her but you didn't. You didn't even try. You tried to save Jasna first, and while you did, your wife, the mother of your children, the woman you loved, died._ She bled out, spending her very last moments in agony and alone, praying for her children, praying for the husband who wasn't there.

You should have been there, but you weren't.

You should have saved them, but you didn't.

Now they're all gone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry! **I'm so sorry this has taken me such a long time to write… I've had a few issues with it! xD I will try to write more quickly next time 'cause if I don't I know that CERTAIN people, (naming no names, but you know who you are!) will pester me for it, I'm sure!

**Disclaimer:** You know the drill by now… I do not own Luka or Abby. Does anyone ever read these anyway? You must know that if I did own these amazing characters I wouldn't be on here, writing about them… I'd be spreading a very clear Luby message around the world! The first lines in italics and with central alignment are lyrics from Greenday – Give Me Novocaine and the second lines also in italics and with central alignment are lyrics from Dido – Don't leave home.

**Dedication: **Wow I swear this list gets longer each chapter! As usual, this story is dedicated to Josefin, Alice, Elissa, Tani, and Andy but I also want a point of also devoting this to Kenzie, Karissa, Allie and of course also to Heather, (who is and always will be, my clone… don't think I was ever going to forget about you!) As I say every time, you people are the best! You make me laugh so much; I don't think I could do this without you, in fact I KNOW I couldn't!

**Thanks:** I want to say a massive thank you to my fantastic reviewers (Josefin-, Andy2301, BeautifulWreck, Peaky, Alik22, CocaCola1052, strumpfhase, LLF, Muskoka Girl, CarbyLivesOn, Moonlight Enchantments, trillion kisses, AmYkYo, VoiceNumber08) because, like I said last chapter, your comments give me a HUGE boost of confidence and encourage me to keep writing!

**A/N:** Right I know I confused some of you with my little comment last chapter so I hope this explains what I meant when I said: "Abby isn't mentioned directly in this chapter, but don't loose faith my lovely Lubies, she _is_ there, all the time." Basically, last chapter was Luka's darkness. The darkness I was talking about in Chapter 1. So yeah, this chapter should, (I hope!) show you all that Abby was there all that time, but that the last chapter was just a description of the darkness. It's a bit angsty at first, but things have to get worse before they get better, right! (That is what people say isn't it?)

…by the way all of the …s in these paragraphs are all for you Heather!

* * *

Now they're all gone.

Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone.

The word resonated in his mind, knocking against the sides of his skull, screaming in his ears. Images projected across his subconscious, locked behind his closed lids. Images of his childrens' faces, with expressions of agony carved on their features. Images of Danijela, with her eyes fixed on him, staring straight at him, cold and unforgiving.

Too quickly. Much too quickly. It was happening too quickly, much too quickly; he couldn't stop it. His temples throbbed as the darkness continued to seep into his body through every pore in his skin.

He was drowning in it. _He couldn't escape. _

It was smothering him. _He couldn't escape._

It was poisoning him. _He couldn't escape._

Silence.

Was it over? No. It was never over.

Silence.

Had it finished? No. It never finished.

Silence.

What was happening? Where was it?

Silence.

Then.

Laughter?

Marko reached out towards him, Jasna reached out towards him. Their small hands teased the corners of his mouth into a smile, the sensation as foreign to him as laughing was. He longed to hold them; he was so close to them, and yet so far, and it was killing him. Then their hands were gone, leaving a trail of blood behind them.

The blood. The pain. The guilt. The death. Their faces.

Then they were gone.

Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone.

GONE!

Abby jolted awake suddenly. Where was she? Her eyes darted around the room and rested on the trembling form beside her. She was home, where she was meant to be, but something wasn't right. She saw that his shoulders shook, and she saw the tears wracking his exhausted body, streaming from his eyes onto the crumpled sheets. _Oh Luka, no._

His heart knocked at his ribs, the blood coursing through his body, begging to burst free from the tight restraints of his veins, and rushing to his head, making him dizzy. He trembled as waves of shivers ravaged his body. Was he cold? No. Was he hurting? Yes. He was hurting more than he ever thought was humanly possible. He lifted his quaking hand to his face, could it be that the darkness left a visible mark? What was that? There was something wet on his face, where Jasna and Marko's hands had been. Blood? No. Sweat, cold sweat.

Disorientated.

Where had it gone? When would it be back? Of course it would, it would always come back. There was no escape, no way out, no remedy. _You know that Luka, don't kid yourself otherwise. It will always be there, it will never leave like they did. It's not a comfort, but it should be. Everyone else always leaves you, but this won't Luka. Get used to it, it will always be there, it will never go away. You'll never be free; you'll always be a prisoner to this darkness. It will always rule over you. You're weak, that's what you are. You're pathetic Luka. You'll always have to face this darkness alone. Never with someone else, always alone. _

Alone.

But wait.

Something is different. You're not alone.

Abby?

"I'm here Luka, I'm here."

She pulled him to her, wrapping her arms around him, holding him tightly; an attempt to protect him from his demons, an attempt to save him from the darkness that encircled him. She kissed his cheeks, his forehead, his lips; the taste of salt resting on hers as she did. She dried his tears, stroked his face, held him close. What else could she do?

_Out of body and out of mind,  
Kiss the demons out of my dreams._

_Oh Luka. _I'm not going anywhere, ever. I'm never going to leave you, I promise. It kills me that I left you before; it kills me that we left each other. I've been lost since that day; I've been lost without you. I wish we had never parted, then maybe I could have saved you from all this. You don't deserve it Luka, you of all people don't deserve this. You're one of the best people I have ever known, you are the best person I have ever known._ I've got you. Hold on Luka, just hold on. I will save you from this, I will heal you. I just wish I knew how._

_If you're cold I'll keep you warm,  
If you're low just hold on,  
Cause I will be your safety._


End file.
